Moved (part II)

Moved (Part I) ...

As she heard the footsteps she quickly put the picture in the box. “Hey I think I better go across and pick up something to munch. You think you can hang in here by yourself for a while?” he asked. She nodded secretly happy that she’d get some time to sneak in and take a look at the other contents of the box.

So as soon as she heard the ignition of his car she scrammed upstairs. She carefully put the box down on the rug on the floor and started going through it. She carefully placed the pictures aside and then found his college sweat shirt, a couple of medals and a few yearbooks. As she picked a yearbook to place it next to the rest of the stuff, an envelope slipped out and fell on the floor with a little clunk.

She was surprised to see her name on the envelope with her present address on it. She opened it and found a hand written letter dated back to about a month after she had left his town and come to live here.  She started to read:

Dear Allie,

I don’t know why I am writing to you, when I can just pick up the phone and call you. I guess it’s easier to be written than to actually speak to you. No fumbles, no dialing your number, no hanging up when I get the machine instead of you.

I don’t know where to begin and what to say. Well, it’s been a very short time since you’ve gone away but this town has missed you, it’s just not the same anymore… I’m not the same anymore.

Why couldn’t I ever talk to you about it? You were always there, right next door, even if just for a short while. Why did I not know how I felt when we spent many evenings sitting on steps of my porch with a couple of beers sharing our lives? Why did I not know, when I called you the night I was down with the flu and you took care of me all night and didn’t leave until I nearly drove you out the next day. Why didn’t I know when I readily drove across town when you were you needed someone to rescue you from a bad date and a flat tire.

What I remember the most is our trip to the vineyard that you took me to, that lazy Sunday morning. We spend all day there. I remember how the ladylike dame I’d seen always was gleaming like a child with her feet in a tub full of grapes crushing it, slipping at times and then the giggle that would turn to laughter. If only you’d see the look in my eyes that day would you know how I’d felt.

Then again how could I ask you to read the signs, when I wasn’t able to decode it myself? That evening as we sat across the table, I wanted to gift you this locket I’d seen you admire at the store a few months ago, and tell you how I felt. But as we sipped the wine you told me you were moving out … the art studio that you were wanting to buyout was finally up for sale and you were going after it with every dime you owned. 

You couldn’t let it go and I couldn’t hold you back.

And here I am today. I thought I was just crumbling to all the pressures of my mundane job, little did I know that I was homesick. You’d wonder how I could be homesick when I was still living in town. I realized that home is truly where the heart is and invariably I had sent it miles away, with you. Yes… it took a fool like me forever to realize that you were my home.

What belongs to you should be yours… so I’m sending you the gift I wanted to give you that night. Happy Birthday, my dear. I will always miss you…

Yours forever.

Jake.

She held the letter close to her heart as she wiped the tears. She then opened the envelope again to find a silver chain with an antic white rose for a locket. She recalled seeing it at the jewelers back then and yearning to own it, but not buying it because she wished to save every penny.

She took the letter and the chain and carefully put it in her bag knowing he would be back soon…

To be continued …

 

Love

Yesterday I fell in love with you.
When we walked together for miles,
And as I told you how beautiful the setting was,
You replied it indeed was 'coz you'd blanked out everything.
All you saw were my smiling eyes.

I fell in love with you...
When you couldn't bear to see me in pain,
So you held me gently like a feather,
Yet strong enough not to let me crumble and break into pieces.

I fell in love with you...
When you lit the room with countless candles that night.
Just to see me glow with a smile.
When  I walked in after a harsh day and a late evening.

Then you went away...
Leaving me yearning for the affection I deserved.

Only to come back into my life.
On a crossroad where so many questions were to be answered.

And I fell in love with you again. 
When you answered all those questions with those beautiful words
"I'll love you forever" ....

Moved ...

He opened his eyes wondering if it was dawn already, sleepily looking at the clock. He was sitting on his couch, with his arms outstretched and her head cradled in his lap. She was still asleep. He looked down at her and smiled, noticing a lock of her brown hair bothering her. So he carefully moved it, hoping it wouldn't wake her. As he moved it, she smiled in her sleep... he wondered what she was dreaming about.

He recalled  the events of the previous day...

He had called her two nights ago and told her that he was moving into her town. Work had brought him here, having to leave back his home and friends. His only consolation that she lived here. The minute she answered the phone, he felt better. Her excitement was infectious making him less homesick. She was gleaming knowing now that he was here to stay. He told her that the packers would bring in his stuff by the morning and he would move in to his new home. Having no other friends in town he asked her if he could help her unpack. She agreed on one condition... that she would plan the rest of the evening and he would have to adhere to it. He couldn't ask for more...

He offered to pick her up in the morning, but she told him that she would meet him outside his new house so he text her the address. By nine am of the following morning he drove towards the country side where he had found himself a cozy two-storey bungalow. As he went past the old Oak trees and the small warm homes, he kept thinking of her, her warm smile, her cheerful eyes; and then of their last date before she moved to this part of the world. How he missed having her around. Only after she was gone had he realized how he had really felt for her, but didn't tell her about it, knowing things would just be more difficult that way.

As her pulled into the driveway, she was standing there with a flask of coffee and a brown bag with breakfast.

He unlocked the door and they stepped in. The furniture covered in white sheets and the sunlight that crept in thru' the door making the entire place light up. She went back to her car and brought a rug so they could sit on the cold floor. And half hour later the packers arrived with all his stuff.

She told him that she will set up the den and kitchen while he could settle the rest of his personal stuff in the bedroom. As it struck one, she thought of getting a Chinese/Indian takeout for lunch. She went to his room but he wasn't there. She saw a box marked personal. Although she didn't want to pry she was far too curious  to know what was in there. She promised she'd just take a peek into the box and then go back. But what she discovered was quite surprising.

She found black and white pictures of them. Pictures of a get-together that he had invited her to, at his home. Pictures she had never seen, including one candid image that was placed in a wooden frame.

That's when she heard footsteps and quickly put it back ...


----- To be Continued

Brown Eyed Girl

Those eyes...
Brown, deep and beautiful.

Those eyes...
That smiled at me from across the room, the first time they met mine.

Those eyes...
That danced like burning flames of desire when we danced with the sand at our feet on that starry night.

That cried when we had a lovers spat and walked away for a while.
And that twinkled with glee when sunny days returned in our lives.

Those eyes...
That naughtily winked when we pretended to be strangers among friends and family, telling a white lie.

Those beautiful brown eyes...
That now encapsulate my crimson dream.
And makes it her vision.

They'll always belong to my best friend and lover... those deep beautiful brown eyes.

Puzzled

When he didn't know who else to speak to about this, he went up to his best friend.

He knocked on her door. She opened the door and he walked right in. They hadn't spoken for a long time and now that he had come up to her, she knew he was in an awry situation.

So they got straight to the point. "What's going on? I know you are here 'coz of her. But now that she's gone, its too late for you to be taking my advice or looking for answers."

He didn't think she'd say anything else, than what he already knew. But he just wanted to put his word forward. So he sat her down and talked. He told her how much he was in love. How she had turned his world around and made him a responsible man. But then she was a world renowned artist and he was just a small time entrepreneur. "She is rich and famous.  I have a successful business but what do I have to offer that she can't have?"

"It's not about stuff, you idiot. It never is", she growled. "Why can't guys get that? Stuff is a substitute of what we accept when we don't get what we want."

"What do women really want?"

"We want to matter." she said. "We want to be the most important part of your world. We want to know you'd be lost without us, that you ache when we are gone and count the hours for us to return. We'll give you our lives forever, if you just make us believe that."

- Note this is not entirely an original write-up but parts of it are an extract from a novel I read. Due credit to the writer for the same."

Did You Miss Me?

I sat by the phone waiting for you to call.
But not once did you decide to dial me.
I patiently watched the day go by.
And gave up when night began to fall.

You were out with friends as they celebrated a special day.
The festivities began and the music started to play.
They were playing a love song,
And everyone picked their partner, to the ballad they'd sway.

And that's when you felt my absence.
Sitting before the bonfire, smiling at yourself.
Wondering what I had been doing all day.

You wished I'd be there too, so you could hold me close.
And dance to the melody, whispering the lyrics softly in my ears.

But I wasn't there.
I was home that late evening, lying in my bed.
With my head on my pillow.
Closing my eyes, imagining you were right here.
And then wondering if you were sitting by the warm bonfire, by the sea.
Saying... I miss her dearly. 


- Inspired by Dan Seals Addicted (painting by Fabiano Parez)

The Midnight Date

It was a busy night for her. Diners continued to pour in despite it nearing closing time. At Not Just Jazz by the Bay on Marine Drive, the band was playing slow rock music. The cool winter night was the perfect setting to wine and dine at a restaurant by the sea. 

She was tired and yet she kept serving drink after drink, with the same warm smile. Her only motivation for now being the extra monies she would earn working two shifts, to fund her dreams. Working the day shift just didn't seem enough anymore. Living alone in the big city has its own disadvantages. But she made up her mind not to sell her dreams short, not so early. Besides she liked working here. Her love for music and being exposed to different genres every time a new band played there was making the second shift of work less stressful.

That evening too, he was there. Standing across the road, wearing his winter coat and dark glasses, looking like a shadowy figure, afraid that she would see him and recognize him. In all these years, it was her that had inspired him to follow his dreams. She had been the catalyst who had changed his life in so many ways. So much so that her determination inspired him to chase his dreams and make them real. No wonder he became successful in such a short time. At that time he felt he was merely imitating her, because nothing else could explain how someone who didn't know where his life was going became a more responsible adult. Her friendship was a blessing he thanked God for every night. 

It was heart-breaking when he had to go abroad for a new project for a year. In that much time, her world had crumbled. Personal failures and financial crisis had shattered her and she had no one to turn to. It took her so long to pick up the pieces and start all over again. 

He had returned to Mumbai about a month ago. The first thing he did when he got back was get in touch with her. After several attempts to reach her on the phone, he dropped by her home. That's when he found out that her house had been sold. No one knew her whereabouts now. 

Then one evening after a client meeting, as he walked out of the restaurant he saw her walk in. At first he couldn't believe his eyes. Was it really her? Or was it the single malt that was triggering his imagination? Before he could walk up to her, she stormed into the staff room. He quietly walked away, not wanting to embarrass her. 

Since then he spent every evening that he was free at the ice-cream parlor across the road so he could catch a glimpse of her. 

Tonight, not once did she step out. As her shift ended she wasn't left with much of an appetite. She went to her locker to retain her bag when she found a box with  her favorite orchid. A little note was pasted on the top asking her to open it and try on what was in it. She was about to throw it into the trash can when a fellow server walked in. "You have to at least open it, trust me." She denied. Then he told her the truth. Someone had given him this package to be delivered to her. "Trust me, it's safe to open it". 

She opened the box and found a beautiful peach chiffon flowing gown and matching stilettos. He left her and told her to change into it and step out. 

As she stepped out, he looked at her in awe. No one in the world could look more radiant that night. The guitarist was playing her favorite tune as he walked up to her. A little table was set up on the pavement right next to the sea with candles and some wine. He hugged her, kissed her hand and gently placed it on his shoulder as they began to waltz under the stars. She was speechless. He simply whispered "Happy Birthday Love. I missed you." 

--- paintings courtesy Carrie Graber

I’m not sorry that I loved you

I’m sitting at the piano can't put my fingers to these keys.

As I start playing something I realize it’s your favorite song.

I see your photo in the picture frame that stands in front of me, reminding me of evenings with you here.

When I'd compose tunes while you'd play the guitar.

Words came to me so easily, as my inspiration was so close to me.

Those deep eyes, that radiated color stronger than the fire lit in the fireplace.

The musk perfume that filled the room.

The sound of your voice that reverbed in my head long after you were gone.

Every song I composed, all the sonnets I wrote

Didn't you see they were meant for you?

They've lost all meaning,

Now I can't sing those melodies,

I've lost them all, now that I've lost you.

You are leaving town to chase your dreams and I can’t bring myself to say goodbye. 

The words I longed for you to say,

I don’t hear them and you don’t hear my pleas to stay.

At the terminal, one last time I hug you.

Silently you whisper those words, say you are taking me along in your heart,

And you'll be back when the journey ends.

Suddenly ...  I’m not sorry that I loved you.


-- Inspiration from Danielle Steel novel .. HRH 

........

I see a glint in your eyes. A need, a want.
To be cared for, to be pampered and to be loved.
You are looking for it everywhere around you, but fail it see it in me.

I am right here, shadowing you. You realize the same, but fear. Fear that what we have would be permanently destroyed if you acknowledge this feeling. So you tuck it away, hide it so no one notices it. But how will you succeed in keeping the truth away from me, your soul mate.

A long time ago we surpassed those barriers. Now an invisible bond connects me to you. One that gets stronger with each passing day.

The world, fate and life may have other plans for us. We don't dare challenge those forces that decide our roles. Yet we reach out to each other. So many times just standing in the corner, smiling at you. Letting you know I'm there. Letting you feel comfortable, telling you that the worst will soon be history, that you will emerge out of this, stronger.

You ask me sometimes through your gestures and other times through the look in your eyes, why this distance between us?

You look deeply into me, knowing very well that even I don't have the answer to your question. All I have is a comforting heart. A presence that will linger until fate decides to give up it's intent and let our souls be one.